Skip to main content

Man Gets Rich by Shorting the Stock of Every Company That Goes Woke Before Pride Month

Man Gets Rich by Shorting the Stock of Every Company That Goes Woke Before Pride Month


A man from New York has made a fortune by shorting the stock of every company that goes woke before Pride Month. He claims that he has a foolproof strategy to predict which companies will suffer a backlash from their customers and investors for virtue signaling.

"I call it the 'woke-o-meter'," he said. "It's a simple formula that measures how much a company is pandering to the LGBTQ+ community and other social justice causes. The more they do, the more likely their stock will tank."

He explained that he uses a variety of indicators to calculate the woke-o-meter score for each company, such as:

- The number and frequency of rainbow-themed logos, products, and ads

- The amount and percentage of donations to LGBTQ+ organizations and charities

- The diversity and inclusion policies and initiatives

- The public statements and endorsements of LGBTQ+ celebrities and activists

- The level of backlash and criticism from conservative media and groups

He said that he then borrows shares of the companies with the highest woke-o-meter scores from his broker and sells them on the open market, hoping to buy them back at a lower price later. This is known as shorting a stock, a bearish stock position that bets on a stock's price decline.

He claims that his strategy has been very successful so far, as he has made millions of dollars by shorting the stock of companies such as:

- Starbucks, which changed its logo to a rainbow-colored mermaid and offered free coffee to anyone wearing a Pride pin

- Nike, which launched a collection of sneakers and apparel featuring the LGBTQ+ flag and slogans

- Disney, which featured its first openly gay character in a Marvel movie and hosted a Pride parade at its theme parks

- Coca-Cola, which released a limited-edition can with the words "Love is Love" and sponsored several Pride events

- Netflix, which added hundreds of LGBTQ+ movies and shows to its catalog and created a dedicated section called "Pride Month"

He said that he plans to continue his short-selling spree until the end of June, when Pride Month ends. He expects that many companies will revert to their normal logos, products, and ads, and that their stock prices will recover.

"I'm not against LGBTQ+ rights or anything," he said. "I'm just taking advantage of a market inefficiency. It's nothing personal, it's just business."

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Shane & Shane’s Newest Partnership: Slayer

Bethel Music Out, “Reign in Worship” Begins In a shocking turn of events, the popular Christian worship duo Shane and Shane responded to the public backlash and have announced that they are canceling their planned collaboration with Bethel music, citing "creative differences" and "theological concerns". Instead, they have revealed that they are partnering with the legendary thrash metal band Slayer for a new album and tour. "We feel that Slayer is a better fit for our vision and message," said Shane Barnard, one half of the duo. "They are passionate, authentic, and not afraid to challenge the status quo. We share a lot of common ground with them, especially on topics like sin, judgment, and the end times." Shane Everett, the other half of the duo, added: "We have always admired Slayer's musical prowess and lyrical depth. They are masters of their craft and have influenced generations of metalheads. We are honored to join forces with them...

April Atheists Day

Pictured: logo of the National Atheist Party (unaffiliated)  April Fools’ Day is a well-known tradition of pranking and joking around with friends and family. But did you know that it is also a holiday for atheists? That’s right, every year on April 1st, atheists celebrate their disbelief in God and mock the religious beliefs of others. According to some historians, April Fools’ Day originated from the medieval practice of changing the calendar from the Julian to the Gregorian system, which moved the start of the new year from March 25th to January 1st. Those who refused to accept the change or were unaware of it were called “April fools” and ridiculed by others. Some atheists claim that this date has now become a symbolic representation of their rejection of the Christian faith and its calendar.  May atheists now hold that April Fools’ Day has become a day of celebration and liberation from the tyranny and oppression of religion. They argue that religion is based on superstit...

Satanists Boycott Halloween, Claim It's a Christian Holiday

Satanists Say No to Halloween, Yes to Satan: How a Religious Minority Is Challenging the Status Quo A group of satanists has announced that they will not be celebrating Halloween this year, citing religious reasons. The group, which calls itself the Church of Satan, said that Halloween is actually a Christian holiday that has been corrupted by commercialism and paganism. "Halloween is derived from All Hallows' Eve, the eve of the Christian feast of All Saints' Day," said a spokesperson for the Church of Satan. "It is a time when Christians honor their dead and pray for their souls. We, as satanists, do not believe in such superstitions and do not want to participate in this mockery of our faith." The spokesperson added that Halloween also promotes witchcraft, ghosts, vampires, zombies, and other supernatural creatures that have nothing to do with satanism. "We are not interested in dressing up as fictional characters or begging for candy from strangers....