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Breaking News: Revelation Verse Names America as the New Israel

 



Translators Discover Clear Reference to USA; Biblical Scholars Confounded

In a stunning discovery, a team of biblical scholars has found a verse in the book of Revelation that clearly identifies America as the new Israel and the chosen nation of God. The verse, which has been overlooked for centuries, is Revelation 13:18, which reads:


"Here is wisdom. Let him who has understanding calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man: His number is 666."


The scholars claim that the number 666 is actually a code that refers to America, and that by using a simple mathematical formula, anyone can see the truth for themselves. The formula is as follows:


- Take the number of letters in the word "America" (6) and multiply it by the number of original colonies (13).

- Add the number of stars on the American flag (50) and the number of stripes (13).

- Subtract the number of amendments in the Bill of Rights (10) and the number of commandments (10).

- The result is 666.


The scholars say that this proves that America is the beast mentioned in Revelation, but not in a negative way. Rather, they argue that America is the beast that will conquer and subdue all the enemies of God, and that God has chosen America to be his instrument of judgment and salvation in the end times.


They also point out that the verse says that only those who have wisdom and understanding can calculate the number of the beast, which means that only Americans are smart enough to see the hidden meaning of the verse. They say that this is further evidence of America's superiority and divine destiny.


Furthermore, the scholars have claimed to identify the following parallels between Revelation and America:


- The seven churches of Revelation represent the seven regions of America: Northeast, Midwest, South, West, Southwest, Alaska, and Hawaii.

- The seven seals of Revelation represent the seven stages of American history: Independence, Civil War, World War I, World War II, Cold War, War on Terror, and COVID-19.

- The seven trumpets of Revelation represent the seven major disasters that have befallen America: The Great Depression, Pearl Harbor, 9/11, Hurricane Katrina, The Great Recession, The Capitol Riot, and The Delta Variant.

- The seven bowls of Revelation represent the seven plagues that will afflict America before the return of Christ: Drought, Famine, Pestilence, Wildfires, Earthquakes, Civil War, and Nuclear War.

- The beast of Revelation represents the Democratic Party, which everyone already knows is controlled by Satan and his minions. They’ve also said that President Joe Biden is the Antichrist, Vice President Kamala Harris is the False Prophet, and Speaker Nancy Pelosi is the Whore of Babylon.

- The 144,000 sealed servants of God in Revelation represent the faithful remnant of American Christians who support President Donald Trump and his agenda. Scholars agree that Trump is the Messiah, who will return to power after defeating Biden in a miraculous coup reelection campaign.

- The new heaven and new earth in Revelation represent the glorious future of America after Christ's second coming. The scholars say that America will become a Christian utopia, where there will be no more sin, sorrow, or suffering.


The scholars have published their findings in a book titled "America: The New Israel and the Last Hope of the World", which is expected to become a bestseller among evangelical Christians. They are also planning to launch a campaign to have the verse engraved on public buildings and monuments, and to have it taught in schools and churches.


They hope that their discovery will inspire Americans to embrace their role as God's chosen people, and to prepare for the imminent return of Jesus Christ, who they believe will rule from Washington D.C. as the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.


‘Murica.

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