Bible App User Looks Down On Technological Illiterates Using Printed Bibles

“You Might As Well Be Using Scrolls,” Says Man Who Only Scrolls Digitally

Modern-Day Miracle: A Bible App

RIVERSIDE, CA - A local man who uses the Bible app on his phone has been looking down on the "technological illiterates" who still use printed Bibles, sources confirmed.

The man, who identified himself as John Smith, said he prefers the convenience and efficiency of reading the Bible on his smartphone, rather than carrying around a bulky and outdated book.

"I don't understand why people still use printed Bibles in this day and age," Smith said. "They are so heavy, slow, and hard to navigate. You have to flip through pages, look up verses in the index, and deal with ink smudges and torn pages. It's like they are living in the Dark Ages. Just because the authors were nomadic shepherds doesn’t mean you have to read like one."

Smith said he enjoys the benefits of using the Bible app, such as having access to multiple translations, commentaries, dictionaries, and cross-references at his fingertips. He also said he likes to highlight, bookmark, and share verses on social media with ease.

"I can read the Bible anytime, anywhere, on any device," Smith said. "I can switch between versions, compare notes, and search for keywords in seconds. I can also customize the font size, color, and background to suit my preferences. The Bible app is clearly superior to printed Bibles in every way."

Smith said he often feels sorry for the people who use printed Bibles, especially when he sees them struggling to find a passage or carrying a heavy stack of books.

"They are missing out on so much," Smith said. "They are wasting time and energy that could be spent on more productive things. They are also exposing themselves to germs and dust that could harm their health. They should really upgrade to the Bible app and join the 21st century."

Smith said he hopes that one day, everyone will use the Bible app and realize how much better it is than printed Bibles.

"Maybe then they will stop being so ignorant and backward," Smith said. "Maybe then they will appreciate the wonders of technology and the beauty of God's word."

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