Church Introduces Tipping Tablet For Good Service

Jesus Paid For Your Sins, Now It’s Gonna Ask You a Question

In a hilarious twist on tradition, St. Prosperity’s Church has introduced a tipping touchscreen tablet alongside its offering plates. Dubbed “Tithe and Tip,” this initiative allows parishioners to express their appreciation for sermons with tips ranging from “God Bless You” ($5) to “Miracle Worker” ($100+).

Pastor Bill Goodheart, the brain behind the idea, believes this will enhance the spiritual experience. “Why not let our congregation tip their favorite sermon?” he said. While many churchgoers embraced the concept, Elder Margaret Grumbleton raised concerns, quipping, “What’s next? A rewards program for attending Bible study?”

To encourage generosity, the church offers perks like “Heavenly Swag Bags” for tips over $50, featuring T-shirts that say, “I’m just here for the free Wi-Fi.” Regular tippers can even enter a raffle for front-row pews or a private choir meet-and-greet.

As St. Prosperity’s navigates this uncharted territory, one thing is clear: whether you’re there for divine inspiration or to leave a little extra love, church services will never be the same again. So don’t forget your wallet next Sunday—after all, as Pastor Bill says with a wink, “Every little bit helps—especially when it comes from above!”

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